SUBWAY STRESS

Well well, what can I say? It seems that many of our trips that
we endured on our long journey included the oh so pleasurable rides
on the Italian Subways. There were no subways in our main town of
Varallo but we certainly got our share of adventures in the big
cities. Rome seemed to be the happening place for these methods of
transportation. Just try to imagine getting off the train ride that
you barely lived through and then having to face the hustle and
bustle of the Roman subways. We were handed tickets along with the
populare phrase that no one seemed to forget, "you lose it, you walk
home!" Mrs. Hott's favorite line. The subways were always very
crowded with numorous and may I add very different people. Once we
lugged all of our luggage down and up the escalators we finally made
it to the loading dock where we would hear the chains of
announcements,,"stay together",,"push towards the front",,"watch your
bags",,"make sure you get in",,"don't get seperated",,"get off next
stop". And once we were on the subway we met various types of
people. There were of course the sneaky thefts who tried to brush up
against you and steal from your pouches, Mrs. Hott almost was a victim of
these crimes. There were the homeless beggers who carried their
helpless babies in one hand and a McDonald's cup in the other that
walked amongst us singing there Italian plees I assume, these
incidents made us all feel very uncomfortable. There were the oh so
yummy Navy guys who seemed to travel in herds with their lovely
fitting uniforms and there seducive stares. There was the foul
smelling, drunken, obviously out-of-place, Australian who entertained
us on one special occasion ride. There was the other drunken but
Italian that the boys seemed to be fond of, so fond actually that
they named him "Manudo", this silly character seemed to follow us for
quite a while and humored our American boys by engaging in a sort of
self-mutilation ritual where he would throw himself into walls and
vending machines. And then there was the all mighty famous "Subway
Transvestite" that gave a sum of us nightmares for many nights to
come, if you would like a more descriptive outlook on this unusual
sight just contact Justin Wilcox. The subways also was decided the
main hunting ground territory for our yummies. They always seemed to
lurk in dark corners then catch our eye as we made our way past
them. Brandy and I also participated in our habit forming
synchronized escalator rides. All in all the Subways were very
interesting and a look into many aspects of the transportation world.

By: Ashley McCauley